Just a little advice here .I have learned from my own mistakes. It is not good to have someone you know in real life help moderate your forum. I thought this would be a good idea because we could communicate about the forum by phone when I wasn't able to be there. I knew the person a long time & felt I could trust them , but when real life arguments take place it can make it hard to work together. One may consider banning the person but that would probably make situations worse especially when you have to deal with them on a daily basis. So take my advice do not have "real life friends" as moderators.


Has anyone had any experiences similar to this?

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Celebrity Forums

Erm yeah, when you appoint your real-life friends as moderators, they sometimes assume they can fool around and do whatever they want since they know you in real life. It resulted in secret, prank editings of other user's posts, or simply acting the tyrant and deleting posts they didn't like, and they also spam. I think they just feel that the rules don't really apply to them.

Another tip... don't let your relatives (cousins..) know you even have a board, or they will blackmail you into letting them have moderator powers.

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I went to Vegas, and all I got was this Blister. - true story!

I had one of my IRL friends as a moderator a while ago and it was just OK. Eventually they became inactive and it was hard for me to get tough on them and tell them that they had to be active if they wanted to keep their position. So now I've learned from my experience and will probably not have any of my friends as moderators.

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Choose your moderators carefully (friend or not). Be sure they're going to be active in the community.

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CafeParents.com - Parent-to-Parent discussion forums

I ran into the same problem once. It's odd, because over time, I would call my moderators friends as well, even though most of them live in the UK

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Yeah i know what you mean, it can happen. Sort of the same thing happened to me lol but he agreeded to stepdown and he was an active member up until...i closed the forum.
But yeah, friends as moderators can be risky.

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Once, I left on a spur of the moment holiday, so quickly changed some permissions and smsed my friend asking if he'd watch the forums while I'm away. Other than that, I wouldn't want a friend/family member moderating my forums - especially if something happens and you're not friends any more

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I have been a mod on a few of Brent's sites, and I know him in real life. In fact, we are going to go get some food with some hotties as soon as he gets out of class! I've never felt that the rules don't apply to me or whatever, it just depends on how well you really know the person and they type of person they are.

Theres an age old saying that says never do business with a friend. I may have pulled that outta my ass but I think it is alright depending on a few key factors.

First, your friend has to have the same goals and expectations for the forum as you. He has to understand the system you have implemented and believe in your methods and at the same time have a satisfactory level of maturity and dedication. I have a friend who helps with my forum (actually a few) and they are doing a great job helping out...then there others who don't understand the value of a forum and i could care less if they even register.

When making someone a moderator (whether or not it is your friend) you have to think of it like having a professional relationship. You would never "hire" someone who didnt have the necessary characterisitics to do the job. And you would never let real life affect your job or vice versa. Friendship and forumship must be kept seperate and that is a fact you must discuss beforehand if you think there is a possibility of things going sour in the future. You never wanna lose a friend over something like this so just think things through before you decide to get your friends involved.